Crystal Castles Craptastically Clobber Creative Commons

I couldn't have said it better myself. And that's the crux of this post. I didn't come up with that catchy title. It was a comment made by someone called "Plurgid". So, here's giving credit where it's due. Hats off to you, Plurgid! You're a cleverer wordsmith than me by FAR, and no, this blog post will not make me any money, but if it did, I'd give you a cut.

This is important. Crystal Castles is hitting critical mass. With a lot of love, comes a lot of hate. Frankly, I have serious informed opinions on the matter and if I was Perez Hilton, maybe I'd spill that shit but all I'm gonna say is I'm with Hipster Runoff on this one. Maybe this whole "crrraaaazy new 8-bit gameboy sound" that all the kids are raving about since they heard "Ayo Technology" is news to some, but to others, it ain't. Case in point:

8 Bit Collective
Lo-Bat
and my pal and longtime 8 bit cruncher
Touchboy

So, what's the fuckin' point? Well, I never got on the Crystal Castles train 'cause something always smelled rotten. And, while I always thought them to be...pretty unoriginal, well, that's just been SUPER confirmed. Plus often, I'm just not in the mood to be shrieked at by chicks who are skinnier than me. Long story short, not only are Crystal Castles endlessly rocking presets, they also appear to pilfer huge chunks outright of other artists songs. Yep, it's been said.

There is a far more thorough examination with tracks for comparison here at CREATE DIGITAL MUSIC . It's an enlightening read and opens up for discussion "just how original is original, these days?".

Touchboy
"Spice Time Is Love"

HOW TO GET MORE HITS ON YOUR HIPSTER BLOG

So I went to the restaurant with my kid sister last week, in search of a decent cheeseburger. I'd heard there was a great place, the new rave of all the gourmands in town. Not your usual tourist trap frequented by Americans in loud apparel. A bona fide, undiscovered hipster joint. So we headed towards the dirty south end of town. No crystal castles here, just a lot of bums, and VNDLSM on the walls. The decor of the bistro was...interesting and featured a large sculpture entitled "The Spirit of Williamsburg"...a monkey playing the drums..some sort of simian mobile disco, it would seem. It was quite beautiful and obviously created by someone with talent, a master of the craft. Stunning. After a long wait, sis and I were seated by our server in an angular, modular banquette. I order the cheeseburger.
"You have your choice between two sides, Aoki leaf salad, which has tons of vitamins for you...or the hot chips." I chose the latter. After a long wait, our food eventually arrives at our table.
Villains! Where's the fuckin' ketchup? M.I.A. Nowhere to be found. So I yelle over to our waiter "yo, quit fuckin' with the presets on your iphone and get me some some ketchup you daft punk! My side of fries ain't gettng any warmer, here!" At which point he offers me a mayo/fresh herb mashup instead. Now, while a lack of mayo for your hot chips would usually cause a riot in Belgium, I was all "WTF..I ain't dim, Mack! If there's any justice in this world you'll go get me some fucking ketchup!" The server seemed rather confused by this, and instead offered me a dessert menu featuring glass candy and some kind of flan with peaches in it. At this point, I just gave up completely...took my poor aching 'ed, banged it on the the table..paid my bill and left.

I gotta say, though, the burger was pretty hyphy.


HISTORY LESSON: SO YOU THINK WE INVENTED SYNTH PUNK?
Well, we didn't. The Screamers did. Well, they might not have invented it, but they sure did it well. RIP, Tomata Du Plenty.



WHO THE FUCK IS COBRAPANTS ANYHOW?
All shall be revealed...eventually.

I_mEveryWoman_VNDLSMRemix_.mp3
"I'm Every Woman"
Whitney Houston
VNDLSM RMX

StupidDumbHyphy.mp3
"Stupid Dumb Hyphy"
Mr. Fab